Online dating guide info
One of my current clients met someone on Ok Cupid, and they exchanged numbers.They sent a few texts back and forth, but then he started blowing up her phone. Biologically speaking, humans are pack animals, and to be accepted into the pack, we must be similar to the others in the pack.Online dating, like anything else, has some etiquette rules everyone should follow.It always amazes me how much people willingly disguise who they are online.I’m not talking about anonymous trolls — I’m talking about how you represent yourself.Listen, I have no problem if you want to add 1 inch or subtract five pounds. But, if the profiles I read are any indication, EVERYONE seems to be “a world-class traveler who’s happy chilling at home on a Friday or hitting the town, loves to explore ethnic restaurants, and enjoys outside activities like hiking, kayaking, or biking.” And then when you go on a date, they’d rather Netflix and chill, or they enjoy sleeping in on a Saturday and lounging around eating pizza. It’s just that you don’t want to misrepresent yourself.However, if you spent some time getting to know them and have built a foundation of mutual respect and, hopefully, interest, then you can start to share more controversial topics. However, when you’re online, you have plenty of time to think about your message. You are a human being first and a potential mate second. You know their real name and possibly their social media handles.On every topic that exists, I have some friends on one side and some on another. Be respectful, be engaging, and be excited to meet them. This doesn’t mean you now can blast invites over Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, Instagram, Kik, Whats App, Tumblr, Linked In, or You Tube.
Author Laura Zinn opines, and I agree, “Be exactly who you are, though this means you’ll get rejected.” That is, until the person who loves everything about you comes along!However, a lot of people aren’t using online dating to their best benefit.One of my recent female clients had only two pictures up, and both were professional shots. It suggests that this is the best she could possibly look, and, in fact, she might be much less attractive.I know this election, in particular, has been extremely divisive, but this is not the time to start sharing your opinions on politics or any other possibly fiery topics. We just avoid those topics because we are adults and enjoy our friendship. The woman you’re talking to is a human being, not an object. I know men tend to just say what enters their heads without passing it through a filter.If you draw out a position that is different from yours right off the bat, you might completely discount the person. It prompts interesting discussions and opens our eyes to multiple sides of an issue, so keep your convo light and fun at the beginning. It can be understandable in person when they get their wires crossed and trip over their tongue. When I am instructing my male clients, I tell them to imagine they are talking to their sister or grandmother at first. The flirting can come later after you’ve had a few emails or calls.