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What is there to say about Kim Kardashian that hasn’t already been said?

If Kris is the trunk of this tree, then Kim Kardashian is the sun that gives it life, the soil on which it stands and the leaves that never seem to actually die, no matter what season it is or how many times people have tried to mow the damn thing down.

So, if Kris Jenner is the trunk of this tree and Kim is everything that gives it life, Khloe is the most relatable thing about the whole fucking tree.

Khloe is the funny one and she’s been the voice of reason for many seasons of Partner: Khloe dated a string of duds before her whirlwind romance with NBA player Lamar Odom.

They are no longer on speaking terms as a result of Caitlyn’s memoir (read: tell-all), in which she described Kris as a control freak, among other things.

Eventually, Kim let the pressure of societal expectations affect her judgment and married a Frankenstein called Kris Humphries, a hell fully explored on .

They separated after 72 days of marriage but weren’t legally divorced for another two years because Kris wanted to turn his 15 minutes into 30.

North West (our eventual queen) is a style icon, Saint West is the cutest baby of all time and newborn Chicago West who Kim is making everyone call Chi.

Baby Chi was born on January 15, 2018 via surrogate.

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