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It’s not that millennials are wrecking marriage, she says.
It may be that they value it more.“It seems everyone is swept up in a very myopic understanding of sex, love and romance,” said Dr.
Whereas a “first date” used to represent the getting-to-know-you phase of a courtship, now going on an official date with someone comes later in the relationship.
And for some singles, sex has become the getting-to-know you phase of courtship. Fisher found that among a representative sample, 34 percent of singles had sex with somebody before the first date.
It’s possible, she said, that today’s singles are carving a more successful path to lasting love than previous generations.“We can all learn from people who don’t want to waste a lot of time doing things that are going nowhere,” said Dr.
Fisher, the co-author of a chapter on “slow love” in the 2018 anthology “The New Psychology of Love,” published by Cambridge University Press.
Another study found that American couples ages 25 to 34 spend an average of six and a half years together before marrying, compared with an average of five years for all other age groups.
Critics say digital saturation has made millennials more socially isolated, restless and entitled, which could explain why they are having less sex than earlier generations.
And when millennials do have sex, it’s often viewed as less meaningful because they engage in “hookups” or sexual relationships described as “friends with benefits.”Dr.
Many say their lives were deeply affected by the 2008 financial crisis as they watched their parents lose businesses, struggle with debt and even go through divorces.“When I first met my fiancé, I asked, ‘What’s your credit score? “In the long run, if we’re talking about marriage, buying a place together, having joint bank accounts and putting cars in each others’ names, those are big financial decisions that will be linked permanently for both of us.
That’s why I ask right away.”Financial issues continue to influence the couple’s relationship.